Sunday, June 10, 2012

Funny "Things To Do" Facebook Status Updates

Jennifer...
  1. is going to buy a parrot and then teach it to say, "Help! I've been turned into a parrot!"
  2. is going to change his name to Simon and then go around speaking in third person.
  3. is driving around town, following runners, and blasting "Eye Of The Tiger" for encouragement!
  4. put some vanilla pudding in to a mayonnaise jar and is eating it in public
  5. is handing out lemons to people on a street corner and wearing a shirt that says "Life"
  6. is going to major in philosophy and then go around and ask "WHY do you want fries with that?"
  7. just ran into a store screaming "What year is this?" and when the cashier replied with the year, I ran out screaming, "It Worked!  It Worked!!!"
  8. is changing my last name to Acula, and going to become a doctor...
  9. just hired two private investigators to follow each other
  10. is standing in a crowded elevator saying, "I guess you are probably wondering why I've gathered you all here today..."