Friday, December 31, 2010

Funny 2011 New Year's Resolutions for Facebook Status Updates


  1. resolves to create the world's most annoying TV show... "Glee: Jersey Shore Edition" staring Justin Bieber, LeBron James and Oprah as the Chilean Miners.
  2. resolves to have each of my resolutions in 140 characters or less!
  3. resolves to stop breaking into song at every opportunity... Or atleast stop watching Glee...
  4. resolves to stop using Facebook as a communication tool for somebody in the same room as me.
  5. resolves to quit his job by swearing at his co-workers, stealing a couple of beers, and running out the emergency exit!
  6. resolves to remember to take his medication to stop his Wikleaks...
  7. resolves to avoid getting stuck in a Chilean mine.
  8. resolves to stop Oprah from making any more shows.
  9. resolves to marry Kate Middleton
  10. resolves to tolerate stupid Facebook status updates as long as they don't waste my time.
  11. resolves to stop using the same old story of being sick to get out of work but instead resolve to make up new excuse for the New Year.

1 comment:

  1. Some of your New Year's Resolution are nearly impossible. I'm sure you will be having the same sets of resolution next year for i believe you will not achieve some if not all of those resolutions this year.